The question sounds very basic.

Yet so many guys just make kids without ever thinking about it. Ask some friends what their role as a father is – “providing, playing, protecting” does not cut it. You might as well mention breathing.

You have to be intentional and very aware of your importance in your kids’ lives.

It takes two sexes to make a new life, we are very different from women, and we have different roles in parenting as well.

The mother is absolutely vital when the kids are small. They simply won’t make it on their own. The mother feeds them, cleans them and loves them blindly and unconditionally. That’s what mothers are the best in the world at.

However, anything above and beyond that requires tremendous effort from women – and they start feeling drained & snap at kids.

As kids grow up and become more independent, they need their father the most, and we’re actually good at what’s required from us – that’s how the Gods intended.

Now to the point, your absolutely non-negotiable role as a father is to:

Teach them boundaries

Kids have a hard time stopping activities or behaviours on their own.

We all know how you can’t make a kid start doing something, and then you can’t make him stop.

Well, as a father you need to be able to make them both start and stop on time.

They should understand boundaries and distinctions between operation modes, activities, and appropriate actions.

The best way to get started enforcing boundaries is by actually working your ass off and having quality time with kids.

Don’t just let them sit on the playground and do nothing – RUN with them and play with them until you are all sweating, and THEN when you tell them it has to be over.

They won’t regret or object too much because they’ve played well.

First we play hard for an hour, and then we will go home and study.

First we get to that hill, then we drink that delicious juice.

First you clean up the room, then we’ll watch a movie.

Keep boundaries small and insignificant at first, but unshakeable. Don’t screw up their sense of worth and navigation by constantly shifting boundaries. Kids love doing their part.

In other words, switching between empty things is the hardest.

Instead, fill up your times with effort and fun, and then make transitions between these blocks non-negotiable.

Mothers are not good at boundary setting – they are too kind and always feel pity for the kids. As a result the kids get conditioned and trained to beg for stuff and use tricks to constantly shift boundaries and deviate from plans, which screws up their character.

Show them consequences

If you never let them fall, get bitten by ants, oversleep fishing, or waste all their money, they will never know how much it sucks and how easily preventable it is.

This one is pretty simple. As a father you absolutely need to let them get their bruises and lessons in relative safety and as early as possible.

Again, mothers have a hard time with this because they are too protective. They’ve grown the kids inside of their bodies and naturally they lose their minds when they get even a bit hurt.

We men, on the other hand, love to test ourselves and see others around us test themselves too.

Our myths are full of revenge and retaliation for a reason. It’s extremely important to understand cause & effect, as well as responsibility and boundaries.

Show them the power of discipline

Repeated regular actions get you to where you want to be.

Just the same as regular inaction gets you to where you don’t want to be.

Sports are great for illustrating progress – any sport works, just constantly point out how they are getting better and better with time.

Saving money, doing push-ups, reading books – emphasise growth to them and explain how it compounds.

Be an actual example

You are the first man your kids see.

Your sons will want to be like you and your daughters will look for a man like you.

Don’t be fat, lazy, unhappy, undecisive – because it will backfire for you.

You don’t want to be reborn into a bloodline affected by your own bad behavior.

The core of any European pagan belief is your reincarnation into your descendants. Your next lives will be directly affected by the way you do things in this one. Keep that in mind.

Demonstrate perseverance and resilience

Firmness of an oak, resilience of a willow. Make them see you fail and get up again, always driven and in good spirits.

I firmly believe that having strong will, drive, and vitality are the main foundations for a happy life of your kids. Giving them that is more important than skills or education

Not skills or education, those things come easy when you have a healthy will.

They should always try again and again, and you must encourage them to do it and teach them to accept mistakes.

Once they know that their will changes circumstances, it will get them set up in terms of health, wealth, and relationships.

Things to watch out for

You are not a punisher. Rather a strong, competent, confident, and experienced play partner.

Always start small, be just, and don’t gloat. Just keep pointing things out to them.

“See you can do this better now. see you did X so Y happened.

“See how only after doing X we feel good about Y”.

You’re doing it all because you love them, so make sure it shows.